Helping Hand
by Crave Kashmir
Summary: The morning after Ron proposes, Hermione is still searching for her right answer. Ginny offers a helping hand and a spell to make the decision easy. Instead there is confusion, violence, no small amount of shouting and more kissing-induced orgasms than Hermione ever thought possible. Angsty and a little fluffy. Hermione/Sirius/Remus


Helping Hand

It was just after six in the morning, but Hermione Granger was sitting at the kitchen table of Number 12, Grimmauld Place. This would not have been unusual except that it was Sunday morning, her one day to sleep late, and that she was still dressed from her date the previous evening. She was wide awake, her eyes fixed on the object in her hands, staring at it in the hopes that, perhaps, if she looked long enough, hard enough, an answer might come to her. Sadly, after eight hours unmoving in the rather uncomfortable chair, the only thing she had was a backache.

Bracing herself, she cracked the lid open and peered into the box, catching a glimpse of the shining object within. She slapped it shut as the barrage of questions hit her again.

The door swung open, but Hermione failed to notice it. Ginny greeted her sleepily, but she made no response. The young woman sat down beside her. Only when she felt the hand on her shoulder did she realise that she was no longer alone.

"Oh, good morning," she said, moving to hide the box, but she was too slow. Ginny acted swiftly, stealing the box from her hands and tearing the lid off.

"Nicer than I expected," the young woman commented. "Especially from Ron."

Hermione took back the box hurriedly and hid the contents, but not before taking another look at the ring inside. It was simple, as one might expect from Ron, just a solid gold band with a single, small diamond. Understated, she might have called it if it had come from someone else. From Ron, however, she knew it was simply the least expensive ring he could find. She did not begrudge him his lack of money. The Weasleys never had much, and she was impressed by the drive it had instilled in the couple's seven children, nearly all of whom had pursued prestigious or high-paying careers – Charlie's dragon-taming notwithstanding. Ron was still in training at the Ministry, and would not be a fully-salaried Auror for at least another three months (if he managed to pass his exams this time around). No, the size of the diamond did not bother her; the trouble was that she was unable to say precisely what did.

"Why aren't you wearing it?" Ginny asked bluntly, her early start dulling her tact.

She hesitated to answer, fearful of what the girl might say, "I haven't decided yet."

"You've been dating for ages," she replied, as if that made her decision easy. "Do you love him?"

Again she hesitated. "Well, yes." It was true. She did love Ron, but she loved Harry and Ginny just as much. She was sure she should love them less or differently than she loved the man whom she had dated for four years, the man who had proposed to her, but she loved them all equally and the same. That was part of her dilemma.

"I have an idea," Ginny said, suddenly sounding more awake than she ever did at such an hour. "There's a spell that will tell you if Ron's the right one."

"I don't know…"

"It's harmless, trust me." Without waiting for permission, the redhead pulled out her wand and waved it in the air before Hermione, casting the spell silently. A chill raced through her, making her shiver, though whether it was from the spell or her friend's lack of consideration, she could not really say.

"What was that?" Hermione demanded.

"A spell to help you figure out if Ron is the one," she replied calmly. "Go kiss him."

"Now?"

"Yes, right now. Then you'll know for sure."

Eyeing her warily, Hermione rose from her chair and made her way up the flights of stairs and past the closed doors that held all her closest friends – Harry, Remus, Sirius and, finally, Ron. She looked at the heavy, ancient wood of Ron's door, wondering for the first time why they slept in separate bedrooms when they had been dating so long. Part of it was Molly Weasley's staunchly old-fashioned ideas about sex before marriage; if she knew where Ginny spent most of her nights, returning to the Burrow in the wee hours before her mother rose, the woman would have a conniption. As it was, Molly had tried luring Hermione away from Grimmauld Place with promises of daily home-cooked meals, but it had not worked. This house was so much closer to her office and she hated the idea of leaving Sirius and Remus; a silly idea, really, since Harry and Ron would still be there if she had gone.

"I should get cleaned up first," she decided. It wouldn't do to stumble into his room and kiss him while still wearing her dress from the night before. Not that Ron would have noticed, but it made a difference in her mind.

She turned and marched silently down the stairs, turning onto the landing and walking face-first into Lupin.

The man rubbed the sleep from his eyes and peered blearily at her. "Is my clock wrong?" he asked sleepily. "Thought it was seven."

"It is."

"Why're you still dressed up, then? _Oh_—never mind, not my business," he insisted, something of a blush touching his face as he looked away from her, still dressed for a date and descending the stairs from Ron's room. He blushed a great deal for a man of his age and experience, though usually only when it came to Hermione and Ron. She supposed it was due to their being his former students, but he rarely responded that way when Harry and Ginny started snogging in the sitting-room.

"Nothing like that," she assured him. "I was up thinking and forgot to change."

He nodded, his thoughts slow to assemble so early in the morning. "Thinking," he repeated. "Ron finally asked."

She replied with a slow nod of her own.

"Oh," he said, sounding almost disappointed. "Congratulations."

She merely hummed in reply and walked past him to her room, wondering why his response has been so lacklustre. Remus was a man whose opinion she valued greatly; if he had so little excitement about the match, what did that mean for it? Were they unsuitable? Ginny had not simply instructed her to say 'yes' but offered a way to know if Ron was right for her. Again, her friend, the sister of the man who proposed, ought to be gushing with joy and demanding she put the ring on without pause. Why would she give her a means of escape if she did not think Hermione needed one?

Sighing, she slipped from her dress and wrapped herself in the silk dressing gown Sirius had given her last Christmas, luxuriating in how it made her feel—beautiful, sexy and a little naughty. She only wore it for the half-a-minute walk between her room and the bathroom, but it was enough to change her entire outlook on a day. Most things having to do with that man affected her attitude, part of her reason for not wanting to move to the Burrow. Molly, lovely as she was, had a tendency to make her feel like a child; Sirius, with nothing more than a glance, could make her feel like a woman, confident and capable. A wink from him over breakfast and she was suddenly raring to confront anything the Ministry had to throw at her for the rest of the day.

"Ridiculous, really," she muttered to herself and stepped into the shower.

Free of any evidence of her date, she threw the silk dressing gown back on and returned to her room. As she dressed in her most comfortable jumper and jeans, perfect for a lazy Sunday around the house, she started plotting how best to approach her would-be fiancé.

"It should not take this much effort to kiss your bloody boyfriend," she chided herself. "You just walk up and kiss him, same as always."

With that deceptively simple plan in mind, she descended to the kitchen to eat breakfast. Ron was there, shovelling eggs into his mouth as he did every morning. Well, there was no way she was going to kiss him like that. What would she tell their grandchildren if they asked what it was like when she had accepted his proposal? 'Well, I went down to breakfast and saw his cheeks distended with food, kissed his yolk-coated lips and knew he was the one.' Hardly.

She sat beside him, stealing glances whenever she dared and not particularly liking what she saw. She had grown used to Ron's eating habits, but that did not mean she enjoyed the sight. Battlefields and dead bodied she had managed to view with minimal turning of her stomach, but catching glimpses of the half-chewed sausage and eggs in his mouth was revolting.

"Close your mouth, you're putting me off my breakfast," Sirius ordered and slapped Ron on the back of his head.

"Oi!" Ron protested.

"My house, my rules," the man smiled smugly, offering Hermione a conspiratorial wink as he leaned in to whisper to her, "We'll see if we can't make him more your style before the wedding."

Hermione looked away sharply. Everyone knew about the proposal. Sirius and Remus and Ginny all knew. And they all seemed to think he was not right. Ginny offered her an escape route. Remus sounded disappointed. Sirius thought Ron needed improvement to be worth her hand. None of this was helping her dilemma.

A sharp jab in her side had her focusing on Ginny again. "Well?"

"Haven't yet," she muttered.

"Well, snap to it!" she ordered. "He's right there, go kiss him."

"But look at him," Hermione grimaced as she watched grease dribble down the young man's chin from the sausage he was eating.

"Hm, yeah, I see your point. After breakfast."

The young woman picked at her food, all appetite lost to the question Ron had put to her the night before. She watched the people around her eat, noting with some dismay the way Sirius, Remus and Harry managed to cut their food and move it to their mouths without making a mess of their faces; how they chewed, swallowed and _then_ opened their mouths to speak; how they watched her and Ron with something in their eyes that looked almost like displeasure. The last one, she was fairly certain, was her imagination, but they were watching her, of that she was certain.

As soon as Ron wiped his face on the napkin, Hermione said, "Ron, can I have a word?"

"Yeah," he replied and stood, swigging down the last of his juice and rushing to catch up with her in the library. "Is this about last night?"

"Yes, but don't ask again. Not yet," she requested as she stepped closer, studying him in a way she had not for some time. He was handsome enough, though he had never truly outgrown his gawkiness. His face and nose were still a bit too long. His freckles stood out on his skin, looking like a smattering of dirt rather than something endearing. Still, she never was one to judge by appearances alone.

"Uh, 'mione?"

"Shush," she ordered and stood on her toes to reach his mouth. It was a good kiss, as were all the ones he gave, but it was no different than any she had ever shared with him. There was certainly nothing magical. Perhaps Ginny had not cast the spell correctly.

"Was that a 'yes'?" he asked.

"Not yet," she said again. "Wait here." She turned and ran back to the kitchen where all discussion stopped immediately upon her arrival. Normally, she would have been annoyed to find that they were discussing her behind her back, but today she had other concerns. "It didn't work."

"What didn't?" Harry asked.

"Nothing happened?" Ginny said.

"Are you sure you cast it right?" Hermione questioned.

"Cast what right? Harry asked.

"I'm sure," Ginny assured the girl.

"Sure about what?"

"How can you be sure?" Hermione demanded.

"Sure about what?" Harry repeated, annoyance taking over the curiosity in his voice.

His fiancée turned to him and smiled sweetly, making him shrink back from her slightly. "Harry, darling," she said, "do you remember that spell I put on myself when I was a little reluctant to settle down so quickly?"

A deep blush reached across his face and his eyes lost focus as the memory returned to him.

Ginny pointed to the young man and smiled rather smugly. "If you didn't have that sort of reaction, then Ron isn't for you."

"So what am I supposed to do now?" Hermione asked, falling into the chair. "What sort of spell was it anyway? Are you sure that it doesn't only work on Harry?"

"If you think that, kiss him," she said. "He'll be out of it for another minute. He won't notice, I promise."

"What?"

"Oh, go on," Sirius said with a smirk.

"He's my best friend," Hermione balked. "I don't want to kiss him."

"How else will you know the spell isn't faulty?" he insisted.

Glaring at the man for knowing how to push her buttons so effectively, she stood and marched around the table. Once in front of her best friend, however, her nerve started to fail her. She took Harry's crimson face in her hands and leaned in hesitantly. Clenching her eyes shut, she closed the gap and pressed her lips against his. He responded out of instinct, kissing her back with surprising fervour; it was wonderful, far better than kissing Ron, but again there was no spark, only sickness to have kissed someone she thought of as family.

"Anything?" Sirius inquired.

"Nothing."

"Knew it," Ginny smiled.

"What's supposed to happen?" Hermione asked. "I mean, how do I know when it's worked? What spell was it?"

"True Love's Kiss."

Hermione snorted. "Fairy tale nonsense. True love isn't real."

"It is," Ginny insisted. "And believe me, when you finally kiss your one true love, you'll know it."

She shook her head stubbornly. "Nonsense," she said again with more force. "I could kiss every bloke I know and that wouldn't make it true love. Love takes effort. It's not magic. It doesn't just happen."

Folding her arms over her chest, a sure sign of a challenge, Ginny smirked. "Why not try it?"

"What?"

"Try kissing every bloke you know," she pointed across the table at Remus and Sirius, who were watching the debate with varying levels of amusement and consternation. "You've already gotten two out of the way, there are another two right there. I'll Floo my brothers if neither of them works out."

"Now you're just being ridiculous," Hermione said. She meant to sound condescending but the words came across as timid and unsure. She had something of a schoolgirl crush on her former professor, and Sirius could melt the heart of any woman given enough time. Exposing herself to such intimate contact with either man was not something she truly wished to do, appealing as the idea might have been.

"And you are stalling. If you want to prove True Love doesn't exist, start with them."

"Don't we get any say in the matter?" Remus questioned, his own reluctance colouring his voice.

"No," Ginny said harshly. "Shut up and kiss her."

"I think I'll pass," the man said with a definitive shake of his head. His refusal ought to have encouraged Hermione, reinforced her opinion that this entire situation was ludicrous; instead, she felt snubbed.

"I'm game!" Sirius said, jumping up from his chair.

"Stop it," Hermione groaned. "This isn't funny anymore."

"I'm not trying to be funny," he assured her. "I'm trying to keep you from marrying a git. No offense, Gin, but that brother of yours is slightly useless." He offered Ginny an apologetic shrug, which the girl returned.

"None taken," she said.

"What is wrong with you people?" Hermione demanded, growing furious at everyone slandering the boy she'd been dating for the past four years. Ron was their friend and family, and if they had such a problem with him and Hermione being together why had they not said something before it came down to a marriage proposal. She glared angrily at them, not realising that the words had slipped out of her mouth.

"We thought you were clever enough to sort it out on your own, pet," Sirius replied, and the others nodded their agreement. "Doesn't take a genius to see you two get on about as well as Remus and a full moon."

"Thanks," Lupin replied sarcastically. "But, honestly, Hermione, we thought you two would fizzle out ages ago, within the first year. Nobody thought it would last this long. The fact that it has…well, we thought it was because you loved him that much. If you're not sure, don't marry him. Simple as that, no spells required."

Sirius rounded on him, "Are you mad? I'm not giving up the chance to kiss her."

"How old are you again?" Remus retorted.

"With age comes experience," he grinned and waggled his eyebrows comically. Even though his words might have been said in jest, the look he sent Hermione left her in no doubt of his experience or the fact that he could bring her to ecstasy with virtually no effort.

She swallowed hard and tore her eyes away from him, turning to the smug-faced Ginny. "Just remove the spell, please," she requested.

"Can't," the young woman said. "Sorry."

"What?"

"There's no counter-spell. Until you kiss the bloke you're meant to be with, it'll stick to you like Ron to buffet," she said. Seeing Hermione's pained expression, she hastened to add, "Don't worry. It won't cause any pain or have any ill side-effects."

"What about mental trauma," Hermione muttered.

"Stop being a baby. You know how to get rid of the spell," Ginny insisted. "You've got one bloke quite eager to please. I don't see the harm."

Hermione scowled and stomped her foot hard against the floor. "What about my reputation, Ginny? I've worked damn hard and I earned every bit of respect and status I've got in this world. It's not easy for a Muggle-born, you know! And now I'm just supposed to swan about stealing kisses from every bloke I meet? _Think_! Everyone's going to see that, and assume I got promoted not because of the work I do at my desk but what I do on my back! _That's_ why I stayed with Ron so long even when I knew we didn't match. If people saw me in a stable and committed relationship, they would never suspect me of such things," she glared hard at the girl. "And now you want me to throw it all away for some fairy tale nonsense just to make you happy? No, thank you, I'll stick with what I know works. Maybe it doesn't suit your vision, but it suits me just fine." She pushed past Ginny as the young woman stood searching for some way to make her actions acceptable, clearly none came to her.

Sirius, however, had no issue finding his voice. "Bollocks to that," he declared and grabbed the irate woman by the arm, yanking her back and pulling her close enough to kiss. And kiss her he did.

Hermione had only felt such a sensation once in her life at the hands of another person, when, by pure chance alone, Ron managed to find that magical spot during love-making that sent tingles down her spine and brought her to that razor's edge of pleasure and pain. She was there again, balanced just on the precipice from Sirius's talented mouth. He ripped a moan from her throat and made her knees weak as the unbearable pleasure washed over her.

He pulled away slowly, breathing hard and smiling lazily. It was obvious, even to Hermione in her stupefied state, that Sirius had experienced the same thing as she. If what Harry felt with Ginny was even half as pleasurable, it was no wonder he lost all coherent thought when she mentioned the spell.

"Holy shit," Sirius breathed and dove in for another kiss.

Hermione expected it to be different than the first time; since the spell had clearly found its mark, it ought to have lifted and left them with the normal, not-nearly-as-orgasmic connecting of mouths and lips and tongues. She thought wrong. It was as good as the first, possibly better, so delicious Hermione curled her fingers into his hair and refused to let him free even after the shuddering stopped and she felt heat running down her thighs.

"Breathe!" Ginny ordered, forcing herself between them. "Breathe!"

"Overrated," Sirius gasped.

"Completely pointless," Hermione agreed and they attacked one another once more.

"Were we that bad?" Harry muttered.

"Worse, I suspect," Ginny sighed.

It took six more tries but Harry and Ginny finally managed to put some distance between Sirius and Hermione. No mean feat given the man's physical strength and the young woman's determination to keep hold of his hair. With magic gluing them each to their chairs, they could only send smouldering glances across the table.

"Just one more," Sirius pleaded. "Just one."

"You said that four kisses ago," Harry frowned. "I'll not have you eating my best friend's face in front of me."

"…we are in the kitchen," he said innocently.

"Shut it," the young man warned.

Sirius pouted and tried fruitlessly to break free of the sticking charm. "A little help, Moony." He turned his puppy dogs eyes to his friend, but his face fell when they landed on the thin, rumpled man. "What's the matter?"

Hermione finally tore her focus off Sirius, following his eyes to see Remus looking utterly dejected. "Remus?"

"It's nothing," he muttered. "I'm fine. Congratulations." He sounded just as disappointed as he had an hour ago on the stairs. Then, he thought she had accepted Ron's proposal; now, he had to assume she would accept Sirius's, though the man had made no offers. In both instances, the only common factor was her.

"Ginny, let me up," Hermione said.

"I—"

"Now," she demanded. Her voice was a far cry from the breathy, lust-filled one she had been begging release with just minutes before. It must have been enough for Ginny to trust she would not simply attack Sirius the second the sticking charm was removed because the redhead waved her wand and set her loose.

"Remus?" Hermione approached hesitantly, blushing scarlet. Despite having just had the most intense orgasms in her life while in his presence, she was having a hard time making this innocent request. "Um…would you mind terribly if I kissed you?"

The man breathed a quiet laugh. "What's the point, Hermione? You've found your match. No need to further harm your reputation by laying your lips on an old mutt."

"Please?"

The low supplication was enough to melt his resolve, and, even though he made no move to signal it, Hermione knew he had given his consent. She drew slowly closer, taking his face in her cool hands and pulling him down to meet her. He refused to look her in the eye, but she persisted, standing on her toes to close the final gap and touching her lips softly to his. Where Sirius's mouth had dominated hers, Remus's met her on equal footing, giving as much as he took and the results were nearly instantaneous. She moaned as he did and her knees fell out from under her, taking her all the way to the floor where she sat panting for a long moment.

"Damn," Sirius whistled. "Did it look like that when I kissed her?"

"Pretty much," Ginny commented.

"That is hot," he growled in approval, adding, "I knew you fancied her, Moony, but _damn_."

Hermione forced her eyes up to look at Remus's face. He was flushed and staring hard at her, his fingers gripping the countertop with strained, white knuckles as he tried to keep himself from falling or from launching himself at her. He did not look particularly pleased, however, so she wasn't sure whether to take Sirius's words as truth. "You fancy me?"

He looked away sharply, as if she had slapped him. "Doesn't matter," he mumbled.

"Oh, quit trying to martyr yourself, you bastard!" Sirius interjected. "Yes, he fancies you. Fuck that, _I _fancy you; _he's_ in love with you. Never admit it, though, the coward. How you ever made it as a Gryffindor is beyond me, Moony. If you spent as much time talking _to_ her as you do _about_ her, maybe she could have figured it out on her own and she'd have been with you the past three years instead of that prat – no offense, Gin."

"None taken," the girl replied reflexively before turning to Remus. "He's right, you know. Hermione's clever. If you gave her the chance, she could have sorted it out."

Remus slammed his hand down on the countertop, startling them into silence. "I know she's clever. Why do you think I stayed away from her? I didn't want her to figure it out. I didn't want her to know because she's the kind that wouldn't care what I am. She would waste her life on me."

"Wouldn't have been a waste," Sirius insisted.

"It doesn't matter," he said, pushing himself off the counter and moving away from Hermione, refusing to look at her. "She's got you now."

"Bollocks!"

Remus paid the man no mind and left the room quickly.

Sirius continued to shout after him, but he did not return. "Stupid, bloody idiot, has the chance of a fucking lifetime and he throws it away. And will someone get me the hell out of this chair!" As soon as Harry waved his wand, the man was running for the door, he paused just as he reached it and looked back. "One more, then I'll go shout at him a bit more." He stole Hermione's mouth until they groaned, then turned and left the girl to gather her wits.

"Two true loves," Ginny marvelled. "Two _hot_ true loves. Starting to wish I kissed around a bit more."

"Oi!" Harry protested.

"Oh, don't be jealous," she cooed and kissed him gently on the cheek. "You know I love you." He grumbled his protest a bit more, but his ire was no match for the young woman's lips.

Hermione frowned as she watched them, wondering what to do with the information the spell had provided. She still did not believe in true love, at least not as Ginny perceived it; she believed in compatibility and chemistry, not in the existence of a single person who was out there waiting only for her. So the spell provided very real, physical proof of someone's compatibility, she decided using what little brainpower she could cobble together after such mind-meltingly fantastic kissing. If the spell had worked on just one of the men, she would have been quite content, but with two such similar reactions she was at a loss for what to think.

Both Sirius and Remus were compatible with her mentally; she had proven as much over the past few years through debates and discussions and general day-to-day living. This was old news. That they were compatible with her physically was the real shocker. She thought back on what she had just shared with Remus and Sirius. Not the intensification of the acts, she was certain that was the spell at work. No, she thought about the actual feelings on her lips and heart. When she kissed Harry, she had felt ill because it was simply unnatural. Kissing Sirius and Remus, by contrast, felt wonderful and right; their styles differed greatly, but they each played perfectly against her. It was as if they had been made to kiss her.

She shook her head violently to dislodge that thought, which was dangerously close to Ginny's true love nonsense.

Neither man had been made for her. What they were was experienced, and it showed. So if that was the only issue with Ron, then surely more practice would suffice. But they had been at it for four years and he had yet to improve. A young man who had spent four years kissing her ought to be better at it than two men who had never before encountered her mouth. It made no sense.

Ignoring the shouting coming from the sitting-room, the confused woman walked straight to the library and pulled Ron into a kiss, hoping that it would result in an equally intense reaction. Ron did react, though his actions had nothing resembling the effect she had wanted. Instead of ruling her tongue like Sirius or sharing pleasure with it as Remus had, Ron seemed to go about traversing her mouth however he pleased, indifferent to whether she was enjoying herself or whether she was even present at all. Daring to test that horrid thought, she stilled all her motions and waited for him to break away and question her inaction. Ron, apparently, failed to notice and continued twirling his tongue randomly around her mouth.

With a sigh, she pushed him away. "Ron, I'm sorry. I can't marry you."

"What? Are you mental? After a kiss like that? I thought that was you saying 'yes'!"

"No," she shook her head sadly. "That was me testing our compatibility."

"We're plenty compatible!" he insisted. "We've been kissing like that for ages, you've never complained before."

"Well, I know better now," she informed him flatly, hating that she might be hurting his feelings.

"What do you mean 'now'?" Ron demanded loudly making Hermione flinch at having stupidly given too much away. "Who have you been kissing behind my back?" He seemed to grow taller with his anger, his face turning unflattering shades of red and his nostrils flaring wide. "It was Lupin, wasn't it? Bloody git's been mooning over you for years. Should've known he would make a move after I popped the question."

The calming words she had intended to leave her mouth got detoured and instead she found herself saying, "You knew he fancied me, too?"

"Everyone bloody knew!" Ron shouted, taking up his wand and storming from the library, leaving Hermione to stand in shocked silence that she had completely missed clues that even Ron had seen.

Blinking back to present, she raced after her jilted fiancé and childhood friend, desperate to keep him from doing any harm. As far as Hermione was concerned, she had done more than enough harm already and all in the name of her own selfishness. She had not once considered Remus or Sirius's feelings in all this…well, Remus's at any rate since Sirius seemed more or less impervious to any criticism anyone might put to him. No, at the moment, she was thinking only of Lupin. "Ron, stop it. Leave Remus alone. He didn't do anything I didn't ask him to."

"You asked him to snog you?" he said through clenched jaws.

"Yes, I did," she said and explained as quickly and succinctly as she could what Ginny had done and her attempts to prove that she and Ron were perfect together. That last bit was a lie, but she did not think it could hurt matters if he thought she had been on his side the entire time.

"Bloody hell," Ron moaned and dropped to the floor. "My own sister turned you against me."

"It wasn't her fault."

"Well, whose was it?" he demanded.

"No ones," Hermione said. "We just aren't right together Ron, you must see that."

He frowned and knit his brow together more out of stubbornness than his putting forth any real thought. "Yeah. Thought maybe if it was official, I could stop worrying and we'd be happy."

"A ring and a change of surname wouldn't have changed anything," she said, sounding more confident than she had all day. "We just don't work, Ron. I love you, really, but I'm not in love with you."

"But you're in love with him."

Him. Remus. Sirius, too. They each had potential. She did love them both, equally and, she was just noticing, a little differently than she did Harry and Ron and Ginny. "I don't think I am," she said as she considered it. "But I could be if I tried a bit harder."

Ron just pouted.

"I have to try. I am sorry, Ron."

"Yeah," he mumbled, not bothering to rise from his seat on the floor of the hallway.

Hermione hurried back down the hall toward the voices she still heard throwing insults at one another. She was too preoccupied thinking about what she would say to take any courage in the fact that she was the one causing the two friends to fight.

Bottom lip firmly between her teeth, the woman forced her hands not to shake and stepped around the corner. She intended to say something, let them know of her decision, ask if they wanted to try, too. Instead, she found herself staring in shocked disbelief. Remus was standing, eyes fiery and lungs working overtime in anger, while Sirius lay sprawled on the Persian rug, jaw cradled in his hand and surprise clear across his face. Of all the things she had expected to see, Sirius Black knocked on his backside by a sucker punch was hardly it.

"Wha-?" she started to say, but Remus turned his hard eyes on her. She feared momentarily that he might lash out at her, too, since she had been the instigator of their discord.

The man strode across the room, stepping easily over his fallen friend and closing the distance between them fast. "Stay away from me," he warned.

"Moony!" Sirius shouted, flinching in pain and touching his jaw again. "Bugger, that hurts. Think he broke something." He stood and hurried to follow Remus, pausing to steal a kiss from Hermione's frowning lips. Hours followed with Sirius's voice filling their ears, shouting at Lupin through his locked door, but it didn't work. He insulted, needled, begged, pleaded, cursed and otherwise cajoled the man, but Lupin never emerged from his room. It was a very uncomfortable Sunday at Number 12, Grimmauld Place. Ron and Ginny returned to the Burrow, taking Harry with them and leaving Hermione alone with the two men she might possibly be in love with.

Like Remus, she elected to hide from this particular problem, locking and warding herself inside her bedroom, focusing as best she could on some work she had brought home with her from the office. It wasn't easy with Sirius's curses coming through her door. She considered blocking the noise with a spell, but she wanted to know if there was a change in their situation, though she found it unlikely that a man of Remus' scruples would suddenly look past his condition and their age difference after a few hours of being shouted at. Eventually, despite the noise, she fell asleep. It was fitful and she woke too often to the rattling of her doorknob and Sirius's voice whispering for her to let him in. Come morning, she was in worse shape than she had been after Ron proposed.

The woman stumbled out into the kitchen, still dressed from the day before, deep shadows under her eyes and a headache pounding at her brain like a woodpecker at a tree.

"There you are!" Sirius shouted, making her groan as the pain echoed in her head.

"Not so loud."

He grabbed her hand and pulled her toward him. She expected a kiss, deep and long to make up for all the hours he had been thwarted outside her door. Instead, he pulled her after him as he ran up the stairs, past his bedroom and up one more flight to stand outside Remus's door. "Been trying to get you here since midnight. What's with the wards on your door?"

"Sorry, I thought you meant to attack me in the night," she replied with an embarrassed blush.

"Well, that might have been true of a couple of the attempts," he admitted with a wolfish grin. "Mainly, I was trying to get you to talk to Moony." He pulled his wand from his pocket and pointed it at the door, sending a potent blast of magic that shot the door from its hinges. After a brief and very self-satisfied smile, he turned to the empty doorway and marched through.

"Moony! Where the hell are you?"

Remus didn't answer, nor did he curse the man for destroying the door or entering without permission. He offered barely a glance at the pair before he turned back to his trunk.

"You're running away?" Sirius demanded angrily, releasing Hermione to shove the man for his cowardice. "What the hell sort of man are you?"

Considering the display of anger she had witnessed the previous day, Hermione cringed in anticipation of the violence to come, of the punch that Remus would doubtless throw at his friend and the livid words that would spill from his mouth. Lupin, however, did nothing. He stumbled and swayed from the force of the blows Sirius showered him with, but he said nothing and returned to assembling his few belongings. This quiet resignation was more painful to witness than anything else, and Hermione had to wonder how many times Remus had been denied what he wanted in life that he was so willing to accept defeat.

"Remus?" she asked quietly, unsure what to say, but determined to say something.

"Don't," he warned, his voice heavy and pained. "You have someone already, Hermione. You don't need someone like me getting in the way."

"Getting in the way?" she repeated.

"You're the rising star of the Ministry, Hermione," he said, slight smile on his face. "You could do anything, but not if you have me weighing you down."

"Oh, will you just stop it!" the shout tore from her mouth, shocking even herself, but it was too late to stop the ire now that it was free. "Sirius is right, you are determined to martyr yourself!"

"Herm—"

"No! You're right, Remus, I am the rising star of the Ministry. I've gotten more commendations and promotions than anyone in history. At this rate, I'll be head of the department in another two years," she informed him flatly. It was a fact, not a boast. "As it is, I've gotten seventeen prejudiced statutes lifted and rewritten twenty-three laws limiting the rights of werewolves, house-elves and goblins. Do you honestly think I'm so incapable that I'd let other people's opinions hinder me? That I would let them stop me from doing what I know is right?"

"No, I—"

"Do you think I'd let a little thing like lycanthropy stop me?"

"It's hardly a little thing, Hermione," Remus sighed.

"It's hardly the devastating thing it once was, though you seem to think it's the end of the world," she retorted. "One night a month, you change. That's it. You're not even that dangerous anymore!"

He shook his head, "But if I forget to take the potion—"

"_If_ you forget, then I'll bind you until sunrise," she interrupted. "_What if_ we go out to eat and I forget to tell the waiter I'm allergic to pepper?"

He breathed a quiet laugh, "I'd always remind you."

"_What if_ we get into a car crash when we go visit my parents?"

"We'd just travel by Apparition," he countered.

"Exactly," she said softly. "There are a million and one _what if_s in everybody's life. You seem to be the only one who lets them get in the way. What if those _what if_s never come? Would you be happy knowing what you missed out on?"

He shook his head. "What makes me happy doesn't matter," he said quietly. "This isn't about me, Hermione. This is about what's best for you. And what's best for you does not include me." He closed the lid of his trunk. The sound of the locks clicking shut echoed in their ears, sounding as final as his words. He took up the handle of his trunk and moved past her to the door, pushing Sirius aside and leaving the room.

"Wait, Moony," Sirius called.

"No, Sirius, I'm leaving. It's for the best."

"Turn around and look at what 'the best' is doing to her," the man ordered. "Look at her!"

Hermione was crying, even though she tried to hide it, Sirius saw. If Remus did, too, she couldn't tell, her vision was blurred and she refused to look, but Sirius was speaking to him. He had to still be there, had to be looking at her as his friend had demanded.

"Are you trying to hurt her?" Sirius asked harshly.

"Of course not," Remus replied, his voice breaking.

"Do you want her to settle for less than she deserves?" he asked, pausing only long enough for his words to sink in before continuing his barrage, working on the man's foibles, playing on his sympathy and love in a way that would have made old Walburga Black proud. "Do you want to see her in the hands and bed of someone unworthy of her? Someone who wouldn't appreciate her talent and beauty?"

"No."

His voice dropped low, becoming a whisper, barely audible but impossible to ignore, urging him to act, "Do you want her to settle for anything less than love and absolute happiness?"

"No, I—"

"Do you think that she's weak? That she could ever be stopped by association with a single werewolf?"

Under such an assault, Remus's resolve could hot hope to hold up. It crumbled to nothing. "She's the greatest human being I've ever met, nothing could ever stop her," Remus replied. "Least of all me." With his admission hanging in the air, he lurched forward to comfort and kiss the woman he had hidden his love from for far too long.

The kiss was unparalleled. Hermione felt herself being swept slowly toward ecstasy where their previous kiss had simply thrown her into it headfirst without finesse or time to enjoy it. This was her idea of heaven and she would never be parted from it no matter what arguments Remus might later think up after he remembered his scruples and began to reform his walls.

Sirius sighed heavily, "Better get a move on looking for my own true love, then."

It took a moment for his words to work their way through her pleasure-addled brain, but when they did she felt a pang of loss. She loved Sirius as much as she did Remus. Years under the same roof taught her that they got on well, their verbal sparring never bringing her to anger or tears but filling her with a flush of excitement and challenge. Ginny's spell had proven that they were more than adequately compatible. She was torn and absolutely refused to deny either of these men that she had potential to love beyond measure.

"Wait," she cried, breaking free from Remus's mouth. "Don't go!"

"I hate to sound like a whinging old werewolf, but you don't need me anymore now you've got him," Sirius said with a mournful smile.

"I won't lose you," she informed him, looking between the two men. "Either of you."

The man looked at her a moment, at the hand she had extended to him and at the man she still held flush with her body. A smirk pull at the corner of his mouth, "Just like that one time, eh, Moony?"

"We were twenty and drunk, don't bring it up again," Remus advised him, though Hermione could swear there was a hint of laughter lurking behind the harsh tone.

The smirk claimed his entire face, lighting up his eyes with mischief. "Well, now, you're 41 and bewitched. Regardless of the circumstances, it's still going to be a hell of a lot of fun." He turned his glittering eyes to Hermione, "God, I love you."

Hermione could only smile and let the pleasure wash over her as she was kissed by the two men she so loved.

End.

* * *

A/N: A short story in which the author thumbs her nose at censorship. Kindly note that there is zero sex. Magical mouth sex so totally doesn't count.

This was not Beta-ed, so if you see any issue (minor or major), let me know. Thanks.

And remember, I can't improve if I get no feedback. Criticism is massively important to me.


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